Anyone who has grown up in an evangelical setting is familiar with Youth Group Guy. He’s the de facto social leader of the youth group by virtue of one or more of the following: having the right parents, being willing to pray aloud in front of the entire youth group, being a part of the youth group’s praise band, being first in line to volunteer for outreach events, being eager to talk about his experiences on missions trips and how they Really Affected his relationship with God, being brave enough to confess to the youth group that he struggles with lust but somehow manages to treat all girls as if their looks don’t matter, promoting virginity via a True Love Waits or similar pledge, having A+ credentials in apologetics, always being the youth group’s number one supporter, being the youth pastor’s favorite and go-to guy for teen cred, and dressing better or at least more uniquely than all of the other guys in the youth group. Sometimes he is considered “good-looking.”
Youth Group Guy typically has an extroverted, gregarious personality and loves to crack unfunny but safe, Christian-approved jokes. Youth Group Guy lacks a sense of irony or sarcasm and has little use for subtext. He tends to be proud that he is ignorant of popular culture and loves to denounce the evils of movies, television, and popular music. He is convinced to his core that he is right and enjoys battling unbelievers on hot-button topics.
Youth Group Guy is usually deeply desired by a large percentage of girls in the youth group, who see him as the sexually pure spiritual leader of their future marriage. He tends to treat all girls equally and doesn’t seem overly interested in girls, yet he always has a girlfriend, usually one of the choicest picks of the youth group (cute, nice, inoffensive, popular, wants to have lots of babies, sincerely loves Jesus).
Youth Group Guy’s future usually follows a track like this: youth group superstar, goes to Bible college, majors in one of the liberal arts, acquires girlfriend who was homeschooled at least through eighth grade, graduates, gets married to college girlfriend, goes to the mission field or seminary, has a bunch of kids.
Sometimes I wish I could be attracted to Youth Group Guy.