Preventive thinking.

6 Jul

Unlike most people my age, I’ve never had sex with a stranger (a.k.a. one night stand) or even made out with/groped a stranger.  Part of the reason for this is that I don’t hang out at places where things like this usually get started (bars and clubs), part of it is that single men in my age range (make that men in general) very rarely even try to strike up conversations with me, and part of it is my morals.  Usually when I am considering bending my morals, though, the following thoughts usually start running through my head:

  • What if it’s bad?  Like, repulsively bad?  I don’t want to be stuck with that kind of memory.
  • What if it’s bad because of me and he tells all of his friends how awful I am and I become a dinner party story?
  • What if he gets fat and bald and I see him again in the future and am stuck with the knowledge that I made out with that bald lardball?
  • What if he becomes obsessed with me?
  • What if it’s awkward afterward?
  • What if I become clingy and emo?
  • What if he has a girlfriend?
  • I probably don’t mean anything to him.
  • He probably wouldn’t care if it’s me or some other girl.
  • What if I find out that he regularly hooks up with dumb, trashy girls?
  • What will my friends think?…oh, who am I kidding?  I know what they’ll think.
  • You’ve been in such a long dry spell…is this the guy you really want to end the dry spell with?
  • Am I going to be glad or embarrassed tomorrow?

I know, I should probably be thinking of Bible verses against sexual immorality instead, but vanity works, too.

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6 Responses to “Preventive thinking.”

  1. Jesus July 6, 2010 at 11:50 pm #

    It’s awkward at first, but you will get over it.

  2. Will S. July 7, 2010 at 6:05 pm #

    Hey, whatever works…

  3. Thursday July 7, 2010 at 6:09 pm #

    What if I get embarrassing sores all over my . . . ?

    (I’ve done some things with girls I shouldn’t really have done, but herpes is a wonderful demotivator from going all the way, at least for me. Remember over 1 in 5 people are infected.)

  4. Thursday July 7, 2010 at 6:12 pm #

    P.S. Condoms only cut transmission by 50%.

  5. Aunt Haley July 7, 2010 at 8:45 pm #

    Yeah, after the fact, I was like, “Shoulda added ‘What if he has a loathsome disease?'” Heh.

  6. Richard Cook July 16, 2010 at 5:28 am #

    Thursday where did you get that statistic?

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