Yesterday I hung out at a friend’s house. It was a perfect day for being outside: not too warm, not too cool, a pleasant breeze, mostly insect-free. Later, after I had advised my friend on her eHarmony matches (they suckered her back in), her brother Fernando and cousin Billy Bob joined us for a game of Mexican dominoes.
Anyone who has played Mexican dominoes before knows that it is not a fast game, so I knew that I had the perfect opportunity to pick Fernando’s brain about dating and women.
Fernando’s main complaint about women and dating was that too many women are “not fun” and only want to “go to restaurants and drink wine.” He wanted to find women who were more interested in outdoor activities like sports, hiking, and camping. Finding non-butch church girls who like to do these things has not been an easy task. Fernando also said that too many women only talk about themselves on dates. When I asked what he meant, he said that they talk too much about their goals in life. He would like to find a funny girl who can make him laugh. When it comes to dressing, Fernando said he loves stilettos and hates pants tucked into boots, unless the pants are leggings. (Where Fernando is going to find a funny, sporty, Christian girl who wears stilettos and doesn’t like to go to restaurants and drink wine and talk about herself the whole time is a good question.)
Fernando didn’t let the guys off too easily, either. He said that at his church, the guys spend all their time messaging girls on Facebook and Twitter and that they have a Sunday face and a rest-of-the-week face. Burn!
Fernando’s comments about boring dates got me brainstorming about date ideas. Here’s a short list of activities that popped into my head:
- See how many grapes you can stuff into your mouth
- Staring contest – whoever laughs first loses
- Print out lyrics to dirty rap songs and give dramatic poetic readings of them
- Go to a store that sells hats and try on all the hats
- Go to a Halloween store and try on clown outfits
- Buy a Lego set and assemble it
- Buy a coloring book and crayons and make art for each other
- Sit on a bench and people watch and make up stories about the people (I recently rented Date Night, and Tina Fey and Steve Carell’s characters do this at restaurants as part of their date night ritual)
- Buy a foreign language beginner book with a CD, learn a few phrases, and then try them out in public
- Go to an arcade and play Dance Dance Revolution (if a group date, Guitar Hero for the Wii)
There really isn’t anything wrong with just going to a restaurant. If you’re a foodie, trying new places can be a lot of fun. I think the main point, especially early on, is to do something creative and interactive where you can build rapport and learn more about the other person in a way that doesn’t come off like a job interview. (Of course, if one or both of you are dull as dirt, the tried-and-true blueprint is a blueprint for a reason….)