Can some of the men here please explain this phenomenon? Typical scenario:
Man and woman meet at a social gathering (church, house party, bar/club, online).
Man and woman hit it off.
Man starts to call woman every day and sends dozens of flirtatious texts. This goes on for weeks. Woman raves to friends about “chemistry.”
Man and woman finally go on a real date (or just have an official one-on-one “hanging out.”)
It goes well. There may be kissing.
Woman does not hear from man for days or even weeks afterward.
When woman finally screws up the courage to ask the man what’s going on, he says that he’s been “busy” or “has a lot of personal stuff going on.” (Or HAS CANCER. This actually happened to a friend of mine, who had dated a guy for a few months. She thought things were going well. Then he went completely AWOL. When he finally resurfaced, he told her that he had been dealing with CANCER. That was the end of their relationship.)
Woman wonders what went wrong/puts man on lifelong hate list.
How can a man go from hot to cold so fast? Women interpret pursuit, especially consistent pursuit, as a sign of romantic interest. For most women, feelings don’t turn off and on light a light switch, so when men flip-flop instantaneously, it throws women for a very confusing, and sometimes heartbreaking, loop. Note that the younger and more inexperienced the woman, the harder this kind of flip-flop is to take. It’s still hard for older women to take, but they usually have enough life experience to know that they have to harden their hearts and move on.