This is a looks post. Insert standard disclaimer about inner beauty, yada yada yada.
The best ways to look better (and sexier) are to (a) be in shape and (b) have clear skin. You can’t really separate the two, because a pizza face will defeat a bangin’ body, and nobody will care about your luminous, dewy skin if it houses a 300-lb. body. Body and skin are two areas where pretty much everyone has room for improvement, too. Unless your job is to be professionally fit and beautiful, there’s always a next level you can achieve in these areas.
But let’s say you have a decent body and decent skin – are you undoing much of the good of those attributes by dressing poorly? I’ve talked about this before, but FIT is the number one thing that can make the difference between frump and fantastic. Clothes that fit properly advertise that you are put together, savvy, and confident. Clothes that fit poorly suggest that you are sloppy, complacent, and/or timid about yourself – NOT that you are so focused on God that you can’t be bothered with the ~things of this world~ like fashion. Also, fit is not about sexy, plunging necklines or short skirts (for the ladies), or leaving half of the buttons of your shirt undone (men). It’s about wearing clothes that are correctly proportioned to your body type. When you wear clothes that accentuate your body (as opposed to showing it off in a trashy way), you’re basically saying, “I’m comfortable with my body, and therefore myself. I’m a person you want to get to know.”
Hipsters aside, most Americans wear clothes that are too baggy. Part of this is probably because too many Americans are also obese or overweight, but how is anyone supposed to see what is good (and sexy) about you if you are hidden inside a fabric bag? This morning at church I sat behind a row of five twentysomethings, and the frump was plentiful on the part of the women. The woman who put the most effort into her outfit was overweight, and the other two were wearing jeans and boring knit tops (and no obvious hairstyling or makeup). Zzzz. The guys looked like they had put more effort into their looks than the women (the guys, too, were wearing jeans that sort of fit), but they could have bumped things up a couple of notches, easily – like going for darker, fitted denim and collared shirts. This is the pickings for singles in the church?
It’s just…if you are single and would like NOT to be single, then stop making it harder for other people to see your inner beauty! If you LOOK like you have inner beauty (yeah yeah yeah, I know, we shouldn’t judge people on their exterior – but when you see someone dressed like a thug, do you not try to move away from that person? so much for not judging people on their exterior…), then maybe people will be more inspired to talk to you to see if you DO have inner beauty. If you’re making people look past 50 extra pounds or through swathes of fabric of an XXL shirt on a M body, you’re just making it harder for someone else to connect with you.
Also: I’ve really come around to the idea that men should always tuck in their shirts. It just looks sloppy (and kind of stuck in 2001/wannabe member of Rascal Flatts/”cool guy church dad”) to leave it untucked. Even for knit polo shirts. Tucking in the shirt and pairing it with a nice belt adds a subtle but nontrivial level of polish to an outfit. NOTE: the shirt needs to FIT – tucking in a billowy blouse-shirt is NOT sexy. But billowy blouse-shirts aren’t sexy and should never be worn in the first place. NOTE 2: the pants need to fit as well. NOTE 3: do not attempt if you have a big ol’ gut. But having a big ol’ gut isn’t sexy, either.